nice
thought
turns
to
action
mine
mindless
gripping
satisfaction
tight
fisted
eyes
squeezed
closed
trigger
finger
itching
lost
in
the
space
between
my
eyes
hiding
in
the
place
where
everything
goes
as
planned
with
the
damned
if
you do’s
if
you don’ts
saying
the
will
do’s
and won’ts
out to
sea
washed
onto the
shore
electronic
version
not
enough
any
more

as i arrived
the beachside
weclomed me
with the already
wide eyed
engulfed by
a seething
urgency
creeping in
picking up steam
if this isn’t heaven
then
all i want is sin
as i swam out
with the clouds
spinning
this is
part of
what I was missing
the rip from swells
rolling in succesion
release through
a flood of adrenaline
swallowed whole
by the
ocean
wrapped tightly
in a swarm of
endorphins
breaking
the surface
gasping
along the shoreline
eyes searching
condos and
hotel balcony lights
punching holes
in the sky
just right
just enough light
one more set
one more ride
before i call it
a night
before i
throw the towel in
pointing north
waves crashing
if this isn’t heaven
give me
a life of sin

my ears burn
my palms itch
sting
whats does
that mean
is someone
plotting
my desmise
while
seaching
your eyes
plans
made
dont seem
concerned
sink
patiently
ears
muffled
out the sound
whats this
no effect
although
i drown
my mind
stays intact
simple as
it is
its never
simple is it
visibly invisible
feeling all your..
isn’t exactly easy is it

the things
you do
when you
are
cut off
from society
never amount
to
anything
when your
only
correspondace
is a letter
you write
the one
you’ve addressed
sealed and sent
and
to which
no one responds
the numbers
you dial
the digits
your fingers
are pressing
the collect calls
no ones accepting
don’t forget me
unless
you choose not to
return to sender
obstructs my view
eyes with anger
big fist bleeding
I’m like this
hard to remember
easy to miss
no collateral left
to put down
no bond to post
counting the bricks
on the wall
recalling
the things that meant
the most
as the long
sunless day
envelopes
all that
was
breaking the haze
sober for days
the erie
silece that
echos
corridors
cell blocks
and halls
inprisons
the lost looks
staring into
the emptiness
of unaswered
collect calls

the rich man peddles influence
the poor man peddles black markets
a common goal,
more money in their pockets
to keep them in good health, pay their bills & taxes,
all common topics
can you blame either one?
do what it takes
to get the job done
food on the table,
smiles on the faces of their,
children…

but who ya gonna trust?
considering this,
if you must
who ya gonna trust
if it has to be one side,
which will it be
the cream that rises
to the top
with all the money
and influence you can’t stop
or do you trust
the one that struggles
to put a meager meal on the table
hungry eyes that go on starving
on their backs they keep climbing…

into the empty mouths i shove this
wealth equals a power you can’t resist
refuse to give in,
even though it looks harmless.
deny it as long as you can
prevent it.

life isn’t about gain
not hand over fist
you might argue that it is
but in the end your checks worthless

life isn’t about,
any of this
accumulating your wealth,
at the expense of the masses

into the empty mouths i shove this
wealth equals a power you can’t resist
refuse to give in,
even though it looks harmless.

Tomorrow will be yet another day
that followed another night
a continuous cycle
broken by the absence of light
these are things that repeat regardless
through sickness and good health
extend beyond all that is lost through living
and found within myself
where I lay, hidden from view
pressed between a mattress and sheets
enveloped in my warm cotton cocoon
where my dreams collide with sleep
my love at my side…
my boys snuggled in bed…
quietly recalling words an old man whispered
words forever stuck in my head
strong, but soft
and as sure as the life he lead
“I love you too, son. I’ll talk to you again real soon.”

it seems to burn them
at a lesser degree
like questions about
the evolutuion of intergrity
the baffling confusion
of what is,
morality
and the blinding reason
found behind their stupidity
the otherwise meaningless
statements made effortlessly
often times more than not,
thoughtlessly
so we cave in
be-friending gravity
baffling them with
our plesantries
smiles and winks
a shaking fist
we say
we like making friends
even out of our enemies

speak in volumes
oh ye,
defenders of our freedom
with your
meager means
that define all meaning
with substance
that fuels the soul
and parlor tricks
like fire breathing

you beat back
the class rings
and
fraternities
the snub nosed
with heavy hands
that manage
to never dirty

you fight the good
for the good
are weak and evil
you fight the evil
for they’re the good’s
bedfellows
and when you’re caught
you declare from the gallows

if our freedoms are outlawed
then only outlaws
will know these freedoms

i suffer from
what others say
was the best thing
that ever happened to them
something that
is greater than

you say
don’t be so hard on yourself
as if you have a choice
when you’re consumed
by thoughts that leave
you haunted
by a voice
and then
you realize
that something
is always
just out of reach
even when
it rests
in palm of your hand